in pieces

PFM · Jun 26, 2013

Time for another chapter in your life. You'll have GOOD women throwing themselves at you to play mommy for your daughter. In so many ways I only see good things coming from this.

Stay strong and move on.

trim · Jun 27, 2013

thanks for all the support guys. i am starting to feel better today, not great but making progress. I went and talked to a lawyer today and I know now the only way to make anything better is to go after full custody. I also moved all of the x girlfriends shit out to my garage, and in the process found 3 different spots where she had been crushing up pills and snorting them. basically found a razor blade a tooter and white powder around it in three different places. makes me sick. i had an idea she was doing drugs but not like this. i am pretty nieve when it comes to that stuff. even though i found that stuff the lawyer said there is no real proof its hers. my worst fear is i will not win custody. will keep you updated as things progress. the lawyer is filing papers tomorrow to get things started.

DF · Jun 27, 2013

trim said:
thanks for all the support guys. i am starting to feel better today, not great but making progress. I went and talked to a lawyer today and I know now the only way to make anything better is to go after full custody. I also moved all of the x girlfriends shit out to my garage, and in the process found 3 different spots where she had been crushing up pills and snorting them. basically found a razor blade a tooter and white powder around it in three different places. makes me sick. i had an idea she was doing drugs but not like this. i am pretty nieve when it comes to that stuff. even though i found that stuff the lawyer said there is no real proof its hers. my worst fear is i will not win custody. will keep you updated as things progress. the lawyer is filing papers tomorrow to get things started.

Keep a dated journal of all the bullshit she does ect....

BigGameHunter · Jun 27, 2013

I just logged in and caught this. I regret hearing this is happening to you man. I just went through 8 yrs of the same behavior in court off and on for 8 yrs, not the cheating but neglect and bad decisions. I won, I refused to let a bitch ruin my childs life. The court fucked me and my kid more than once but I insisted I was right and finally got some justice.

My point is, it gets better, I will certainly be here for should you have any questions. You should insist on drug testing Mom. They will test you too, but youll be fine. Document that shit and if you can afford it hire a PI. Keep your cool and avoid any contact with her without a witness thats on your side. Dont call her more than you need to just little things like that set the tone for me being labled a psycho instead of a concerned parent.

Good Luck Trim.

LeanHerm · Jun 27, 2013

Brother were all here for you. Just don't do nothing crazy because your daughter needs you and there's alot of life left to live. So live trim and live the best that you can. Fuck the rest brother.

trim · Jun 27, 2013

Another update, Her parents did an intervention with her last nite, and she agreed to go get help. She said she is not leaving until monday, so I am not holding my breath until she actually goes. She is in the stage now where she wants to get back together with me. A part of me really wants to, but I just know there is no way in hell she would actually change her ways, plus I dont think I could get over some one cheating on me. I would end up cheating on her to get back and we would be back to square one. I just wish I was mentally tougher right now for these decisions. I did end up changing the locks on all my doors, so she cant get into the house with out me being there, plus signed the contract and gave the money for the lawyer to start the process of proving she is my child. I am not taking no for an answer when it comes to getting custody. I think she finally realized what she had and what she lost. She called me doing the whole sob story about wanting me back. Moving all of her stuff out of the house to the garage really hit home for her. Thank god I didnt put her on the house loan when I bought it, and thank god I never married her.

creekrat · Jun 27, 2013

Should be able to get full custody based on her past and now her known associate

creekrat · Jun 27, 2013

she's gotta fix herself before you can take that leap. Make her earn it and if she does don't hold it over her head. bury the hatchet and move forward

trim · Jun 27, 2013

unfortunately the guy that sells drugs has never been caught doing it, and she herself has never been caught doing it, so no record means its just he said she said and none of that holds up in court. I know and many other people know what she is, but its proving it thats the problem. Its going to be a fight for sure.

BigGameHunter · Jun 28, 2013

The thing about being tough in a mental sence is. You dont know what your made of until your foundation is shook. Your taking care of buisness I think your tougher than you think. Just stay focused on whats important, your daughter.

If you and Mom try again to be together only you know whats in your heart. Were here for you man.

LeanHerm · Jun 28, 2013

Trim bro I would not give her the time of day. Cheating on her to get back at her doesn't change shit. All that means is you cheated on her to make you feel better but in reality hôw could you trust her not to do it again? You can't do it and your daughter doesn't need to be around that.

BigGameHunter · Jun 28, 2013

Youll hear alot of advice on what you should do about Mom cheating on you. My goal is not to belittle any of whats been suggested just remember your true friends will not judge you for what you decide to do with Mom. You follow your heart and dont be too hard on her especially if she is sincerely trying to change. The two of you with your shit together have will have a better impact on your babys future than you alone.

If shes not sincere then I know youll do whats right.

dboldouggie · Jun 28, 2013

Yeah none of those r options ur the the bad one here big bro. U gave her ur heart and u helped her when she was down and this how she re pays u. The best thing is leave her and get custody of ur child. Even if it means exposing her dirt. But, for ur daughters sake don't go psycho. She needs atleast one good role model.

creekrat · Jul 1, 2013

The thing about he said she said in divorce/custody proceedings is that it is a civil matter and that means that it is based upon tge preponderance of evidence (50.1% is all you need) as opposed to criminal proceedings that require beyond a reasonable doubt (100%)

SFGiants · Jul 1, 2013

creekrat said:
The thing about he said she said in divorce/custody proceedings is that it is a civil matter and that means that it is based upon tge preponderance of evidence (50.1% is all you need) as opposed to criminal proceedings that require beyond a reasonable doubt (100%)

In California they don't even use police reports in Family Court thye don't even allow them at least in 97 they didn't in my case.

graniteman · Jul 1, 2013

^^^Yep, all depends on what state you live in. Here in Kali it's a 'no fault' divorce. Who ever is the most stable usually prevails in custody matters and whoever has the most money pays the most.

For me, No trust , no relationship.

AlphaD · Jul 1, 2013

Hey Trim, I just got back from Vacation, and logged in to see all this going down. The brothers offered a world of advice, so all I have to offer you is, take care of that little girl, by far the most important thing in this situation. Far too many kids slip between the cracks during spousal conflicts and/or custody battles, and are confused, scared and ultimately get angry. My your little girl top priority, and although you hate her mother to the core of her bones, speak kindly of her in front of your little girl, because tiny ears hear everything, and it's not her place to choose sides. Just my two cents brother.

in pieces

PFM

Elite

trim

Elite

DF

Elite

BigGameHunter

Veteran

LeanHerm

Elite

trim

Elite

creekrat

Elite

creekrat

Elite

trim

Elite

BigGameHunter

Veteran

LeanHerm

Elite

BigGameHunter

Veteran

dboldouggie

Senior Member

creekrat

Elite

SFGiants

Elite

graniteman

Senior Member

AlphaD

Elite

Similar threads

New Posts

New Threads