Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 12 of 31
  1. #1
    Elite DNW's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    425
    Thanks
    750
    Thanked 391 Times in 171 Posts

    Getting to know DNW222 better

    This is a really long read but is what's going on in my life right now.

    A little bit of history with my mom first... She's borrowed money off and on for years and has burned me a few times (she had/has a gambling problem). We had a fallout and didnt talk for years.

    Three years ago I started trying to be a better person, mentally and physically. Decided to give relationship another try. Wasnt long before she started asking for money again. Just told her I didnt have it. Eventually I gave in and would only give her $200 at a time.

    So two months ago she calls me asking for $1400 or she's getting evicted. "Yea, dont have it I'm sorry." Get a call a couple days later asking if she can "sleep on living room floor" or they are going to a shelter. Talk to the wife and we agree...mostly bc I dont want to live with the guilt. Told her she had 4 months and she had to sign an agreement, which she said was ok.

    She had to borrow roughly $400 from us so she could rent a car and gas. She and her 15 yr old adopted autistic son start driving from Florida to my house in TX. Instead of using money to get groceries, she would get them fast food or Starbucks. Her excuse was it's cheaper to get fast food then to spend it on more groceries. She even rented a car for a couple days so she could take him out bc "they were cooped up".

    "Mom, you still havent paid us back and you're eating out, renting a car, going bowling, whatever...its disrespectful."

    "We are used to a certain lifestyle and try and tell that to a 15 year old autistic kid."

    Hahahaha



    "Easy. We have to eat cheap and have no life bc we are living in my son's dining room in his 1500 sq ft house, with his wife and 2 kids."

    So I finally give her the agreement today. It lists them as guests and says things like you leave what you came with, duration of stay, 30 day notice at 3 months...sh*t like that. She signs it, hands it back to me and says "dont worry, your stuff is safe now".

    "Excuse me?"

    "We won't steal your stuff and we'll be out of your hair soon."

    "Would you like to leave earlier?"

    More stuff was said back and forth. Needless to say it should be an interesting 2 months.

    And this is one of the many reasons I LOVE the gym.
    Last edited by DNW; 07-19-2019 at 02:01 AM. Reason: Dining room not kitchen

  2. #2
    Moderator-San Jin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    Far East
    Posts
    7,504
    Thanks
    8,487
    Thanked 10,412 Times in 4,532 Posts
    I applaud you wanting to help your mother.

    However, you seem to be enabling her.

    You shall know the truth and the truth will make you odd.


  3. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to Jin For This Useful Post:

    BRICKS (09-12-2019),BrotherJ (07-19-2019),CJ275 (07-21-2019),Deadhead (07-19-2019),Solomc (09-06-2019),TODAY (07-19-2019)

  4. #3
    Elite DNW's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    425
    Thanks
    750
    Thanked 391 Times in 171 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Jin View Post
    I applaud you wanting to help your mother.

    However, you seem to be enabling her.
    Yup, agreed. Wanted to be able to say I did everything I could so I could move on with clear conscience.. Conscience is clear

  5. The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to DNW For This Useful Post:

    BRICKS (07-19-2019),CJ275 (07-21-2019),Rhino99 (07-19-2019),snake (07-19-2019)

  6. #4
    Moderator-San Jin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    Far East
    Posts
    7,504
    Thanks
    8,487
    Thanked 10,412 Times in 4,532 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by DNW222 View Post
    Yup, agreed. Wanted to be able to say I did everything I could so I could move on with clear conscience.. Conscience is clear
    Glad to hear it.

    Cut the cord. She needs to hit the bottom to wake up.

    You shall know the truth and the truth will make you odd.


  7. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to Jin For This Useful Post:

    BRICKS (07-19-2019),BrotherJ (07-19-2019),DNW (07-19-2019)

  8. #5
    Moderator-San Jin's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2017
    Location
    Far East
    Posts
    7,504
    Thanks
    8,487
    Thanked 10,412 Times in 4,532 Posts
    Now you can afford to want to pay for that blood work

    You shall know the truth and the truth will make you odd.


  9. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Jin For This Useful Post:

    CJ275 (07-21-2019),DNW (07-19-2019)

  10. #6
    Veteran snake's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2014
    Location
    North East
    Posts
    8,061
    Thanks
    6,281
    Thanked 10,153 Times in 4,366 Posts
    I would never want to be a burden to any of children. It's a sad story and hope the best for everyone.
    Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.

  11. The Following User Says Thank You to snake For This Useful Post:

    DNW (07-19-2019)

  12. #7
    Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2019
    Posts
    17
    Thanks
    14
    Thanked 11 Times in 8 Posts
    You did your part man, she will most likely keep up that behavior as long as you let her. She's an adult and she knows what she's doing. Like jin said you're probably just enabling her at this point. There's no need for guilt You have a wife and kids to worry about and who knows where this could lead if you let it keep going further.

    It's sad but sometimes people only learn the hard way.

    Wish you luck, I hope it all works out for you and your family!

  13. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to TcWrstling For This Useful Post:

    BrotherJ (07-19-2019),DNW (07-19-2019)

  14. #8
    Elite Rhino99's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2017
    Posts
    1,066
    Thanks
    1,224
    Thanked 678 Times in 429 Posts
    Similar story with my dad...good luck bro, I know where you're at.

  15. The Following User Says Thank You to Rhino99 For This Useful Post:

    DNW (07-19-2019)

  16. #9
    Elite BRICKS's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    3,081
    Thanks
    7,022
    Thanked 4,754 Times in 1,907 Posts
    Good luck man. Bad behavior only changes when it becomes more painful to continue it than to change it.

    Check the laws in your state. In some states it is extremely difficult legally to get somebody out of your house once you let them in. I had a huge problem with this in CA years ago,it was a
    nightmare

  17. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to BRICKS For This Useful Post:

    CJ275 (07-21-2019),DNW (07-19-2019)

  18. #10
    Elite Viduus's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2018
    Location
    Upper Midwest
    Posts
    2,317
    Thanks
    1,699
    Thanked 2,053 Times in 1,171 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by Jin View Post
    Glad to hear it.

    Cut the cord. She needs to hit the bottom to wake up.
    From personal experience they sometimes just hit bottom. Either way, your obligation is to your wife now.
    Best raw lifts on the platform
    Squat-60 Bench-Bar&one clip Deadlift-NA

  19. The Following User Says Thank You to Viduus For This Useful Post:

    DNW (07-19-2019)

  20. #11
    Elite DNW's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    425
    Thanks
    750
    Thanked 391 Times in 171 Posts
    Quote Originally Posted by BRICKS View Post
    Check the laws in your state. In some states it is extremely difficult legally to get somebody out of your house once you let them in. I had a huge problem with this in CA years ago,it was a
    nightmare
    Yea, its definitely a concern for us, which is why we are giving 30 day notice. After a month of stay (paying or not) they have rights.

  21. The Following User Says Thank You to DNW For This Useful Post:

    BRICKS (07-19-2019)

  22. #12
    Elite DNW's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2018
    Posts
    425
    Thanks
    750
    Thanked 391 Times in 171 Posts
    Had a fight with mom tonight. A lot of stuff was said like "you're not the son I raised" and "my son didnt come back from iraq." My ears are red f*cling hot. Gym
    Never play gay chicken with a Frenchman. You will end up with a sore asshole.

    ~Spongy is a gentle lover~

Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. Getting in better shape
    By elysse77 in forum Training and Workouts
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 06-12-2019, 03:05 PM
  2. I know, I know... P.H.'s... boooo... But what are you thoughts on this?
    By nightster in forum Pro Hormone - Natural Steroids and Steroid Alternatives
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 05-23-2014, 09:47 AM
  3. It's been a pleasure getting to know you all at ugbb
    By LeanHerm in forum General Chat & Conversation
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 11-06-2013, 07:07 PM
  4. It just keeps getting better.
    By bubbagump in forum General Chat & Conversation
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 05-16-2013, 09:52 AM
  5. getting to know grizzld
    By grizzldsealpoacher in forum New Members Introductions
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 04-23-2012, 06:50 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •