What's wrong with these children

Boytoy

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Ok so my child just turned 16. His mother couldn't handle him so he comees to live with me.
Been here for 8 months and doesn't do shit but play video games, which I don't care long as he doesn't do drugs.
Little shit bucks up on me when I trying to correct him so I put him on the ground. Never hit him or anything and then his mother comes to get him and they take out an assault charge.
Not worried about the legal shit but she couldn't control him and then when I try she takes out papers? Wtf is wrong with these children?
 

Boytoy

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Maybe don't know. Hell I was just trying to help. Ungrateful they are but is fine. Truck I got him and dirtbike is for sale. Don't think you should get law involved with family affairs.
 

Jin

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Ok so my child just turned 16. His mother couldn't handle him so he comees to live with me.
Been here for 8 months and doesn't do shit but play video games, which I don't care long as he doesn't do drugs.
Little shit bucks up on me when I trying to correct him so I put him on the ground. Never hit him or anything and then his mother comes to get him and they take out an assault charge.
Not worried about the legal shit but she couldn't control him and then when I try she takes out papers? Wtf is wrong with these children?

So sorry you have to go trough this. How frustrating and unfair.

I’m not trying to be abrasive or accusatory, but broken up families have a deteriorus impact on children.

A healthy relationship between spouses is one of the best things you can do for your children’s emotional well being.

Life happens. Shit happens. But divorce and separation always cause deep wounds.

There are probably a lot of factors at play. But if you posted in hopes of a real answer that might sting, then what I say I’ll stand by.

Again, not trying to offend you or say it’s your fault.

IME it’s always better to parent from a perspective of empathy rather than bitterness. I am successful maybe 55% of the time.

Children are exceedingly frustrating. I hope things work out with the BS charges.
 

Gibsonator

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Have been having similar issues with my 16 1/2 year old son and his mom not being able to get along, everytime they fight he says i'm moving to my dad's he treats me better and all that shit.
I have so far been able to diffuse each situation, but it's only a matter of time.
I have him stay here for the week at least once/month, and whenever else. That helps at times and at other times is the cause of the problem. Ive had to explain to him several times that he cannot expect to get the same thing there as here as we parent much differently.
Anyways i'm all about peaceful coexistense and my wife and i like our peace and privacy, plus i am trying to deal with it best i can. Running off to another parents house doesnt solve problems.
If the day comes the door is open, he knows what i expect of him when he is here and he knows damn well i wont put up with any kind of back talk or disrespect. I'm the most chill ass dad you'll ever meet, aint got time for that.
hope everything works out. try nlt to ruin your relationship with your son over this.
 

Boytoy

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Not really looking for answers just wanted get off my chest.
I agree with the divorce thing but she was a slut and I was a drug addict. So just bad timing.
Always value your opinion. Thanks for reply
 

Boytoy

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Thanks gibs but to me that has crossed the line. I would never do that shit to my dad even though he was a piece of shit. I
 

Gibsonator

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all good i would put his ass on the ground too. your his dad, i see no wrong doing here.
not like ur just physically abusing him to get out ur anger or cause ur some sadistic pos
 

Boytoy

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Lot better to him than I was treated. Maybe the problem. Yeah I just threw him down didn't swing or anything. Had perfect position for knee as well lol. Thank God that didn't happen. Just no respect these children.
Got hit with frying pans and 2×4 but never called cops.
 
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deejeff442

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Yep my girl has a useless jobless and 2 kids 25 year old.
He got a,flat today and,cant even chenge a tire .
Couldnt figure out how the jack works seriously.
 

Texan69

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Wait, they actually filed charges? Police actually filed assault charges on you for that?
what state are you in?
that is absurd if so. Corporal punishment is allowed in the US. Obviously if you did that you a little child or wailed on a kid and knocked him out, used a weapon, strangled etc or caused major injury but that’s a different story than we got here . Even if he didn’t buck up on you if you wanna put him on the ground for being a little shit that is your right as a father.
on the flip side if he was a random man and he bucked up on you and you put him down that ain’t assault that be self defense. You don’t have to wait to get assaulted to defend yourself.

ive been to a lot of calls like that, usually ends up with me telling the kid don’t be a shit and you won’t get spanked. One kid wanted to file charges on his dad for breaking his xbox that was a gift from his dad. 13 year old lol and when he was told his father did not commit a crime he wanted to speak to my supervisor! 13 years old. Kids are getting worse and worse these days
 

Boytoy

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He left last night and sent me a picture of the paper for the state versus me for assault this evening. I sure nothing will come of it but it's the principle. Am in north Carolina
 
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Texan69

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Ya I think you’ll be ok, in Texas this would be considered a child discipline issue
 

BigGameHunter

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Sorry Bro. Sounds like his mom is the problem. Lawnmower parents that mow down every difficult situation for their kids are doing them no favors.

When my step son was about 10 he got in trouble with me for disrupting class and got grounded from his dirt bike for a month and he started this I’m going to live with my dad. I asked him why would you do that, your Father will make you mind too? He said I don’t think I’d be in near as much trouble with him over something like this. Me and his father are good friends lots of mutual respect for on another.

I told him I’ll make a deal with you. You call your Dad and tell him you were fukin up in class and tell him your punishment here and that you’d rather he punish you for this. He thought about it for a minute and decided not to call his Dad. I asked him why not call him and he said because he will kick my a$$. LOL. Me the kid and his bio father still have a good laugh about that.
 

Boytoy

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Sorry Bro. Sounds like his mom is the problem. Lawnmower parents that mow down every difficult situation for their kids are doing them no favors.

Yes think your 100% correct there. Is stupid cause she called me to have him move here cause she couldn't handle him and then when I try too she thanks me by this shit. Freaking stupid. He just playing her to get his way and she too stupid to see it.
 

Bobbyloads

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Not really looking for answers just wanted get off my chest.
I agree with the divorce thing but she was a slut and I was a drug addict. So just bad timing.
Always value your opinion. Thanks for reply

Straight up appreciate that you didn’t place blame on one side lol she was a slut I was an addict. When he gets older he will understand sometimes you just have to let it be until it fixes itself naturally.

That police shit ain’t cool my mom got me on a domestic when I was 17 didn’t even hit her and that shit haunts me until today.

Don’t care if it’s family or not you lazy you don’t do shit you ain’t gonna be shit sometimes hard love is the only way to go bro I got it and I turned out half way decent they let my sister walk all over them she’s 30 living with my mom no job a supposed lesbian and an inspiring rapper yeah seriously ****ing loser.

Sell the car sell the dirt bike and don’t give any financial help unless he deserves it.
 

chandy

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i disagree with the divorce stuff. honestly sometimes the best thing for the kid and the parents is a divorce. say what u want but if a kid has to sit through parents trying to kill each other pulling guns on each other or threatening to cut their throat out. and u are there as the kid having to stop shit like that all the time. get a ****ing divorce. i'm not even saying it has to be that extreme. just using personal examples. but kids having to deal and see with a bunch of stupid shit affects them all the same if not worse.

secondly with all due respect **** your ex. that game of pretending to be the good/nice parent and turning ur kid against the other is ****ed up. i can't stand that shit. if she couldn't handle him she should have backed you up as long as you weren't doing something illegal such as literally abusing him. not what the kids call abuse nowa days.

thirdly if he actually goes through with the papers and tries to do anything. sell (or just keep where he cant touch for quite awhile) every ****ing thing u own that "is his" he obviously doesn't want you nor your support. why give him anything? he will then see what all u did and provided for him. allowed him to go and do. maybe learn a little respect

i can't say to much i was a hell of a kid for many years. went off never told anyone anything as a like 10+year old be gone all night. disrespected a lot of people as a kid. but not no 16 years old. and anytime i might have slipped i was sure as shit told with pretty much anything that was around that could be grabbed and swung with good force. or a fist if nothing was around.

but i still love my old man i see that even tho he did have anger issues he was doing the best he could at the time. and hopefully your kid no matter how hard u might be on him will come back to look at it the same way as i do with him.

Good luck brotha! hopefully all that stupid shit is dropped
 

Trump

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I feel blessed my 16 year old sons mother left us before he was 1 and never came back. Best thing that could of happened for him. He is a good kid now, and has no interest in her. Calls my wife mum
 

Robdjents

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My advice is quit "putting your kid on the ground"...if you want a delinquent then treat him that way but all you are doing by treating him this way is creating a monster....i promise whatever respect he did have for you is now gone..not telling you how to disipline your kids just being real with you...on the other hand i hope things get better
 

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