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Thread: Eye Contact

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    Veteran BigGameHunter's Avatar
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    Eye Contact

    Im interviewing a guy last week for a mgr postion that came open here. On paper he is one of the most qualified people Ive ever interviewed. He will not make eye contact with anyone though even on a hand shake. Ive noticed this about him, its shifty and makes me not want to trust him. I hired him but not as a mgr. If he fixes this then hes mgmt material.

    I dont think hes bad or anything, I really think its because hes young and so many of the younger people Ive seen often dont have the ability to communicate face to face. Its all facebook and internet and text. The only younger ones Ive noticed that dont have this flaw are former military.

    I know this is a small thing and I present this because it could mean everything when in competition for a job in todays market.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    My 2 cents worth is that those questionable to be offered positions wih a chance of promotion after three months,

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by BigGameHunter View Post
    Im interviewing a guy last week for a mgr postion that came open here. On paper he is one of the most qualified people Ive ever interviewed. He will not make eye contact with anyone though even on a hand shake. Ive noticed this about him, its shifty and makes me not want to trust him. I hired him but not as a mgr. If he fixes this then hes mgmt material.

    I dont think hes bad or anything, I really think its because hes young and so many of the younger people Ive seen often dont have the ability to communicate face to face. Its all facebook and internet and text. The only younger ones Ive noticed that dont have this flaw are former military.

    I know this is a small thing and I present this because it could mean everything when in competition for a job in todays market.
    Teach him bro you'll be helping him grow into a man.
    Knock Em Down and Keep Em Down!

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Bring it to his attention. Remember what culture of pussies he was raised in, people are afraid to OFFEND so they just never said anything to him. If he fixes it, he's teachable and your man, if not he's got some underlying issues.

    I've known a few in my life in the same no eye contact thing going on, needless to say none are in my life today. I shit canned them and now VERY weary of anyone that cannot hold eye contact.
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    Re: Eye Contact

    Ask him what the **** he's looking at

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by PFM View Post
    Bring it to his attention. Remember what culture of pussies he was raised in, people are afraid to OFFEND so they just never said anything to him. If he fixes it, he's teachable and your man, if not he's got some underlying issues.

    I've known a few in my life in the same no eye contact thing going on, needless to say none are in my life today. I shit canned them and now VERY weary of anyone that cannot hold eye contact.
    Yeah Im giving him a shot. Ive known some in the past that also didnt make eye contact because they were abused. I think hes just use to chatting online and stuff. We will see.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Good Post Bro.... the under 28(ish) crowd is a different breed. A lot of it is because of the non-face-to-face communication they are used to. Some of it can be due to abuse... keen that you picked up on that.... and some is cultural. I had several black players over the years that when you were reading them the riot act would look away or look straight ahead or look down.... I like the idea of seeing if he can take advice and instruction by hiring him provisionally as well. If he can't take constructive criticism or learn to do things they way you want he isn't your man no matter what he looks like on paper.

    We have an entire generation of males that do not know how to shake hands or look you in the eye... we are indeed in the midst of what Woody Hayes described as the feminization of the American Male. By the way, he said that in the 1970's.

    Respect,
    Vette
    Hung like Einstein and Smart as a Mule.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    I take it as a sign of a changing culture. In working with some, Asians for instance, it can be a sign of disrespect to look someone directly in the eyes. For young Americans, I'd just take it as a sign of lack of confidence.


    Either that or he's feeling like a pussy cause his T numbers are low.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by 63Vette View Post
    Good Post Bro.... the under 28(ish) crowd is a different breed. A lot of it is because of the non-face-to-face communication they are used to. Some of it can be due to abuse... keen that you picked up on that.... and some is cultural. I had several black players over the years that when you were reading them the riot act would look away or look straight ahead or look down.... I like the idea of seeing if he can take advice and instruction by hiring him provisionally as well. If he can't take constructive criticism or learn to do things they way you want he isn't your man no matter what he looks like on paper.

    We have an entire generation of males that do not know how to shake hands or look you in the eye... we are indeed in the midst of what Woody Hayes described as the feminization of the American Male. By the way, he said that in the 1970's.

    Respect,
    Vette
    I'm under 28 and I'm not one of those pussies. I have feelings too.

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    Veteran BigGameHunter's Avatar
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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by 63Vette View Post
    Good Post Bro.... the under 28(ish) crowd is a different breed. A lot of it is because of the non-face-to-face communication they are used to. Some of it can be due to abuse... keen that you picked up on that.... and some is cultural. I had several black players over the years that when you were reading them the riot act would look away or look straight ahead or look down.... I like the idea of seeing if he can take advice and instruction by hiring him provisionally as well. If he can't take constructive criticism or learn to do things they way you want he isn't your man no matter what he looks like on paper.

    We have an entire generation of males that do not know how to shake hands or look you in the eye... we are indeed in the midst of what Woody Hayes described as the feminization of the American Male. By the way, he said that in the 1970's.

    Respect,
    Vette
    In his case hes lucky he brings alot to the table even if he isnt mgmt material. Otherwise he wouldnt get this chance. It takes too many resourses to constantly train new people. He is very detailed and I can use him in another capasity if he doesnt mature a little (dealing with ins adjusters and stuff). Hes white my crew is half Tejano/Mexican and sad thing is this flaw could cost him about 20K per year. Respect is a big part of their culture.

    Im thinking I will pair him with someone that has this strength but lacks what the prospects strengths are (details) maybe they will learn together and make each other better.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by BigHerm View Post
    I'm under 28 and I'm not one of those pussies. I have feelings too.
    There are exceptions grasshopper.

    Respect,
    Vette
    Hung like Einstein and Smart as a Mule.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    I have been in sales for over twenty years. And I tell my kids all the time that technology is great and useful if you make it work for you, not make it work you. I gave a lecture a couple months ago on this whole topic of technology, lack of respect, handshaking and eye contact, the whole nine yards on it. Ultimately, we have a serious problem because I see a generation of people that won't be able to be in front (comfortably) of other people, and that is the building block in ALL sales.....my 2 cents I could be wrong #:-S

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by AlphaD View Post
    I have been in sales for over twenty years. And I tell my kids all the time that technology is great and useful if you make it work for you, not make it work you. I gave a lecture a couple months ago on this whole topic of technology, lack of respect, handshaking and eye contact, the whole nine yards on it. Ultimately, we have a serious problem because I see a generation of people that won't be able to be in front (comfortably) of other people, and that is the building block in ALL sales.....my 2 cents I could be wrong #:-S
    I would like to hear more about your speeches on this topic. Especially the responses you get.

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    Senior Member Times Roman's Avatar
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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by BigGameHunter View Post
    In his case hes lucky he brings alot to the table even if he isnt mgmt material. Otherwise he wouldnt get this chance. It takes too many resourses to constantly train new people. He is very detailed and I can use him in another capasity if he doesnt mature a little (dealing with ins adjusters and stuff). Hes white my crew is half Tejano/Mexican and sad thing is this flaw could cost him about 20K per year. Respect is a big part of their culture.

    Im thinking I will pair him with someone that has this strength but lacks what the prospects strengths are (details) maybe they will learn together and make each other better.
    This is not a bad strategy. Ever hear of the "Peter Principle"? You risk that with this new guy. So pairing with someone that has the characteristic he lacks will show YOU whether or not he is a leader or a follower. If he let's the other guy take over and be more dominant, but with fewer skills, then you have your answer right there. A manager needs to be a leader, not a pushover.

    It feels like you've been doing this awhile yourself mate!

    Good luck!
    ---Roman

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Never heard of Peter Principal. Interesting. Ive got my eye on it.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    I'm a tradesman. In your apprenticeship you find a journeyman who will teach you what he knows and help guide you.

    This is absent in white collar work IMO. Plus boys are raised by women these days.

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    Senior Member Times Roman's Avatar
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    Re: Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by BigGameHunter View Post
    Never heard of Peter Principal. Interesting. Ive got my eye on it.
    The Peter Principle is a belief that, in an organization where promotion is based on achievement, success, and merit, that organization's members will eventually be promoted beyond their level of ability. The principle is commonly phrased, "employees tend to rise to their level of incompetence." In more formal parlance, the effect could be stated as: employees tend to be given more authority until they cannot continue to work competently. It was formulated by Dr. Laurence J. Peter and Raymond Hull in their 1969 book The Peter Principle, a humorous [1] treatise, which also introduced the "salutary science of hierarchiology."

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Principle

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Since I am one of these guys that are in the age bracket you are talking about I'm going to give my input. I have noticed guys my age doing this. I always make direct eye contact and feel like a FIRM handshake goes a long ways. There are a lot of pussies being raised nowadays. I guess it is the parents fault. I think my parents have done well about teaching me the fundamentals of engaging with other men and things like that...
    Live Laugh Love Lift.

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    Re: Eye Contact

    Im 30 and ill look you in the eyes until you look the other way. Has always worked for me.

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    Eye Contact

    Originally Posted by Times Roman View Post
    The Peter Principle is a belief that, in an organization where promotion is based on achievement, success, and merit, that organization's members will eventually be promoted beyond their level of ability. The principle is commonly phrased, "employees tend to rise to their level of incompetence." In more formal parlance, the effect could be stated as: employees tend to be given more authority until they cannot continue to work competently. It was formulated by Dr. Laurence J. Peter and Raymond Hull in their 1969 book The Peter Principle, a humorous [1] treatise, which also introduced the "salutary science of hierarchiology."

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_Principle
    That's funny cause my boss is an incompetent moron and is totally unqualified. And his name is Peter. He's also a total cock. A synonym for cock is Peter.
    "Overzealous dosing" -Jin

    Rest in Peace Robot Lord. First round of Natty Boh is on me when I make it up there with you brother.

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