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Senior Member
- Joined
- Jul 23, 2021
- Messages
- 410
- Reaction score
- 507
- Points
- 63
Not sure why I'm posting this here, but there are a lot of people I respect on this board. I've been married about 3.5 years. I spend winters in SE Asia as I had been before my marriage (she's fine with this actually). However this time when I was getting a ticket home, I was told she didn't want me back. So I'm stranded overseas with nowhere to live in the US.
We're starting video counseling sessions, at least, even though she said it's too late.
I have no idea how to approach these sessions, or our infrequent personal calls. She shows total disinterest. I generally believe that trying to win a girl back looks weak and unattractive, and drives them away – but that has apparently already happened. I'm trying to keep a strong, confident front, but i'm starting to crack and it shows.
I'm in a very weak position since I need to go home for employment. I also have a much better chance of preventing divorce if we talk in person, which she won't do. If I fly back to attempt it, and it doesn't work out, my savings will evaporate quickly.
Full disclosure – this is all my fault. I haven't been faithful to her at all, and I've been an asshole frequently when we are together.
I can (and have) apologized, promised I'll change, and all that – but it's just empty words. I think action and showing that I'm willing/able to change would be most effective – but I can't do anything from across the world. I can't even tell the counselor my location since they won't treat someone in a different country.
I'm really in an impossible situation. If anyone has a similar experience, or just general advice, I would really appreciate it.
Just as a sidenote—I'm not going to blame this on AAS—but there's been an undeniable personality change since I began. I'm wondering if I should bring this up in the next session to be fully transparent (wife already knows). This is something that should be mentioned more often when talking about the risks of using gear.
We're starting video counseling sessions, at least, even though she said it's too late.
I have no idea how to approach these sessions, or our infrequent personal calls. She shows total disinterest. I generally believe that trying to win a girl back looks weak and unattractive, and drives them away – but that has apparently already happened. I'm trying to keep a strong, confident front, but i'm starting to crack and it shows.
I'm in a very weak position since I need to go home for employment. I also have a much better chance of preventing divorce if we talk in person, which she won't do. If I fly back to attempt it, and it doesn't work out, my savings will evaporate quickly.
Full disclosure – this is all my fault. I haven't been faithful to her at all, and I've been an asshole frequently when we are together.
I can (and have) apologized, promised I'll change, and all that – but it's just empty words. I think action and showing that I'm willing/able to change would be most effective – but I can't do anything from across the world. I can't even tell the counselor my location since they won't treat someone in a different country.
I'm really in an impossible situation. If anyone has a similar experience, or just general advice, I would really appreciate it.
Just as a sidenote—I'm not going to blame this on AAS—but there's been an undeniable personality change since I began. I'm wondering if I should bring this up in the next session to be fully transparent (wife already knows). This is something that should be mentioned more often when talking about the risks of using gear.